Welcome, Fellow People in Progress | Ep. 1
What does it actually mean to be happier? Not perfectly happy, of course, just...more? That's the question driving this podcast, and in this first episode, hosts Hannah Choi and Amy McDuffie introduce themselves and the show they've been dreaming about building together.
You'll hear how two executive function coaches met virtually, started monthly coffee chats, and realized their connection was something worth sharing with the world. They talk about what this podcast is (real stories, real science, honest conversation) and what it isn't (toxic positivity, expert advice from people who claim to have it all figured out). Because as Hannah and Amy are the first to tell you that they're people in progress, too.
In this episode: who they are, how they met, why executive functioning and happiness are more connected than you might think, and a peek at what's coming up, including conversations about happiness vs. contentment, stress, grief, goals, and what happens when you achieve everything you wanted and still wonder what's next.
Other happiness resources:
The Happiness Lab with Dr. Laurie Santos
The Science of Well-Being - Dr. Laurie Santos
Happiness Podcast with Dr. Robert Puff
Psychology Today article on "being happier"
This podcast is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you need help, please reach out to a qualified licensed provider.
Transcript
hi everyone.
Speaker:Welcome to, I think I can be happier.
Speaker:Today we are introducing our new podcast
Speaker:Woo.
Speaker:and Anna, I'm so excited.
Speaker:How are you feeling?
Speaker:I'm so excited too.
Speaker:This has been, , you know, in the works for quite a while, so it's really
Speaker:fun to actually be recording with the intention to drop this episode.
Speaker:So I'm super excited and I'm so happy to be here with you.
Speaker:I know,
Speaker:This is so fun.
Speaker:This is so fun.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:this for a while and I'm glad we're, we're finally making it happen, so Yeah.
Speaker:, I guess we should introduce ourselves a little bit.
Speaker:, I am Hannah Choi.
Speaker:I am.
Speaker:Amy McDuffy.
Speaker:Amy and I met as executive function coaches, right?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Hannah, I realize when people hear executive function coach, that may
Speaker:bring up, you know, a lot of questions.
Speaker:So for anyone who might be wondering what that is, , executive function
Speaker:coaching just helps people work towards their goals, , and helps
Speaker:them address their challenges.
Speaker:By supporting, you know, skills like task initiation, time management,
Speaker:emotional regulation is a big one.
Speaker:And also help them reduce procrastination.
Speaker:So,
Speaker:also build confidence through all that, right?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I know from my own, my own experience working on my executive function
Speaker:skills, I feel like I've become a more confident person, so.
Speaker:Definitely.
Speaker:Me too.
Speaker:And I
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:yeah, like the habit formation along with, with all of that too is a big part of it.
Speaker:Just getting into those new habits.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:, So people may, you may recognize me from Focus Forward, which was a podcast
Speaker:all about executive function skills.
Speaker:And so in this podcast, the main focus isn't executive functioning,
Speaker:but because we are executive function coaches and live in that world, we do.
Speaker:Just look through everything, life, behavior, everything through
Speaker:that executive functioning lens.
Speaker:So you're probably gonna hear us talking about it a lot, , as we just
Speaker:sort of naturally tie everything back to executive functioning and, , these
Speaker:life skills, they're just so critical for supporting us through life, through
Speaker:every, every single day that we live.
Speaker:And so.
Speaker:We just felt like there's such a strong correlation between strong
Speaker:executive function skills and this idea of like being happier.
Speaker:So it's like a really nice lab.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:The marriage of the two
Speaker:hannah, do you wanna, do you wanna share a little more about, Yes, we worked,
Speaker:we worked together, , just how we ended up, you know, becoming friends from
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So Amy and I do not live in the same area of the country.
Speaker:Well, we're both on the east coast, but I'm in Connecticut
Speaker:and she's in North Carolina.
Speaker:So our friendship did develop virtually.
Speaker:, We worked together on some projects and then we ended up
Speaker:working on a webinar together and.
Speaker:We just realized, we really clicked and we were like, wait a second,
Speaker:there might be something more to this than just a, you know, just
Speaker:like a professional relationship, so.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Hannah, I remember we, , yeah, we started out by setting up monthly,
Speaker:like virtual, coffee chats,
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:which was so great.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:, I love to think about, I remember the first time, , you texted me because you
Speaker:had asked me for my phone number when we were working on a webinar, and I think
Speaker:your first text, I would have to look,, but it was something like, you are so
Speaker:going to regret giving me your number.
Speaker:And I, that just makes me laugh because like absolutely, like
Speaker:one of the best things ever that's happened to me is, , yeah.
Speaker:Being your friend.
Speaker:So,
Speaker:Aw.
Speaker:but I love that.
Speaker:So here
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Here we are.
Speaker:I am, I'm, I'm thinking back and I think what I meant by that was, uh, let's
Speaker:go, come along for this ride with me.
Speaker:Let's get into some shenanigans together.
Speaker:And, um, yeah, it's been, I'm, yeah.
Speaker:My friendship with you is one of the things in life that I'm just
Speaker:most grateful for, so I'm so glad I that I got your phone number.
Speaker:me too.
Speaker:So glad
Speaker:Yeah,
Speaker:all that, so,
Speaker:I know, right?
Speaker:It's amazing what can happen when you take a leap and say yes to stuff.
Speaker:Hannah, do you wanna tell us a little bit more about your background as well?
Speaker:Yeah, yeah, sure.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So you guys can get to know us a little bit.
Speaker:Uh, so as I mentioned just a little bit before, I did just, , wrap up four years
Speaker:on the Focus Forward podcast, which was just such an amazing experience.
Speaker:I loved every minute of it.
Speaker:And, , I got to collaborate with some really amazing people.
Speaker:Sean Pots, my, my favorite, , Sean and I worked on that podcast and grew
Speaker:it from nothing, , over the years.
Speaker:And, and it was just, uh, such a great experience and I learned so much doing it.
Speaker:I learned about myself.
Speaker:I actually discovered I had a DHD through the process of, uh, hosting that podcast.
Speaker:And, , finding that out.
Speaker:Getting that diagnosis has just.
Speaker:, Been the best thing ever for me.
Speaker:So I just really wanna, you know, , acknowledge how important that experience
Speaker:was for me and how grateful I am for Focus Forward but work-wise, i've just
Speaker:always been in helping professions.
Speaker:I think I must have set out early on to never make any money because I've just
Speaker:always been in helping professions.
Speaker:And I think that's, you know, the, the, the work that, that, that
Speaker:work is just so much more important to me than anything material.
Speaker:So, , I have always supported students mostly and, . Then I, I actually fell
Speaker:in love with working with college students when I was in the accommodations
Speaker:office at the Santa Barbara City College, , back before I had my kids.
Speaker:And I, I really loved working with college students there.
Speaker:And then after I had my kids, I needed to go back to work.
Speaker:And so I started working as an executive function coach.
Speaker:And then that's when I really discovered, the importance of executive
Speaker:function skills and then that role expanded into hosting, um, webinars
Speaker:and the podcasts and having speaking opportunities and, and I don't know,
Speaker:I just discovered that side of me.
Speaker:I didn't know that I loved the public speaking and, and, uh,
Speaker:and that kind of education.
Speaker:And so I've just really enjoyed that so much and, and I'm, and, and I
Speaker:just really, really believe in how.
Speaker:Important strong executive function skills are, I've seen it in myself,
Speaker:I've seen it in my clients, and I really like thinking about them as
Speaker:strengthening them, strengthening them globally, and not just these life hacks.
Speaker:Like, I feel like so often, like social media that, you know, makes, it makes
Speaker:you think like, oh, just get a planner or just do this, you know, like, just
Speaker:put on a podcast while you're doing the, the task that you hate doing.
Speaker:It's like, yeah, those things are great.
Speaker:It gonna, is it going to, create lasting change?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:we need to really look at more than just those and really do some deep
Speaker:work on all the other executive function skills that support us too.
Speaker:So, yeah.
Speaker:Absolutely.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Tell us, so tell the listeners about you, Amy.
Speaker:What was your, what was your journey?
Speaker:Also, you haven't done a podcast before, so how did you, how
Speaker:did you get to this right here?
Speaker:Well, how I got to this moment is, it's because of you, so, yes.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So ultimately that, but yeah, just to share a little about my background.
Speaker:I , come from a background of being in helping professions as well.
Speaker:I spent years working in schools and I have a background in behavior.
Speaker:This eventually like, just kind of naturally led me into a deep dive into,
Speaker:executive function strategies because a lot of my work focused on self-regulation.
Speaker:And I also needed very, very strong self-regulation to do my job every day.
Speaker:You know,
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:challenging situations, , just really taught me a lot about the
Speaker:power of compassion and the need to prioritize happiness for myself.
Speaker:One of my former supervisors long ago, asked me, you know, how I
Speaker:showed up to work every day, you know, with the ability to, you know,
Speaker:bring some light into situations.
Speaker:And it really made me think about, you know, the choice that I made every day
Speaker:when I walked in the door to do just that.
Speaker:And it wasn't easy.
Speaker:It was definitely not, um, something that.
Speaker:You know, it was easy to do.
Speaker:It took a lot of work on my part.
Speaker:, And I was able to make that choice though because did a lot of work behind the
Speaker:scenes and went through a lot of trial and error to get there, to figure out, you
Speaker:know, how to make that happen for myself.
Speaker:. And then I eventually that led me into executive function coaching.
Speaker:Felt like I was ready to embrace that a hundred percent.
Speaker:So that was about five years ago.
Speaker:you know, coaching is one-to-one, it's individual.
Speaker:So I feel like and I doing this podcast is really an opportunity to, you know, make.
Speaker:An impact on a larger audience.
Speaker:And also, you know, I wanna learn how other people find happiness, you
Speaker:know, across different circumstances in their lives and, you know, dealing
Speaker:with those challenges as well.
Speaker:So, yeah, I'm excited to dig into this.
Speaker:And how do you feel about your voice being out there for people to hear?
Speaker:I mean, you've done, you've done the webinars, but this is, this is different.
Speaker:This is different.
Speaker:This definitely
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I mean, just to be honest, I'm, I'm nervous.
Speaker:It's a little scary to think about that.
Speaker:I've always been you know, a very private person.
Speaker:I'm absolutely introverted.
Speaker:So this is definitely, a big push for me to get out here.
Speaker:But it's also comforting knowing that you're here, you've done this.
Speaker:And I, I know I'm gonna learn a lot from this experience.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:It's, it's, it's different for me too, because on Focus Forward, I didn't have
Speaker:a co-host, so this is kind of exciting.
Speaker:But also I'm, I'm I, well, we've already recorded some things
Speaker:and I do, I'm like, oh, Hannah, you gotta stop hogging the mic.
Speaker:But it's just, I just like switch into podcast host.
Speaker:Mode.
Speaker:So
Speaker:great.
Speaker:yeah, so I think, I think as listeners, it will be cool.
Speaker:I hope that you stick with us along the way because I, I do think that
Speaker:this show is going to evolve as we both learn and as we both, discover what
Speaker:works for us and, and what doesn't work.
Speaker:And so if you are listening to this first episode and you decide
Speaker:to join us for this ride, I think it's going to be pretty great.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:there's just so much to be learned and so much growing to do.
Speaker:And, uh, we are one of our, one of our goals, like our first goal really is
Speaker:to be as like, authentic as possible.
Speaker:And, you know, this isn't gonna be, highly polished, you know,
Speaker:like, uh, like slick production.
Speaker:We are really trying to just be ourselves and, one of my favorite quotes that
Speaker:helps me so much is by Arlan Hamilton, and she said, be yourself so that the
Speaker:people looking for you can find you.
Speaker:And so if this show is for you, then welcome.
Speaker:And if it's not for you, there are so many other amazing resources out there.
Speaker:About the journey, uh um, or about the sort of adventure of
Speaker:finding whatever this happiness is.
Speaker:There are so many resources.
Speaker:The Happiness Lab, the Happiness Podcast, the, I mean, the Science of Happiness.
Speaker:There's so many amazing resources out there.
Speaker:So if we are not for you, don't worry.
Speaker:We're not offended, but you know, find the resources that support you.
Speaker:And if we are for you, welcome.
Speaker:I know.
Speaker:That's great.
Speaker:That's
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Hannah, thinking about that, thinking about all of these
Speaker:other podcasts out there.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:What, like, why do you think, why do you think we need another one here?
Speaker:Mm. Yeah, that's a good question.
Speaker:Uh,
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So, uh, when I was thinking about, well, first of all, my A DHD was
Speaker:like, you gotta do another podcast.
Speaker:do it right now
Speaker:So, yeah, do it now.
Speaker:So about 10 years ago I was walking home from dropping my kids off at school
Speaker:and it was just like a regular day.
Speaker:Nothing interesting about it.
Speaker:And all of a sudden I had this thought that just came to me and it was, I
Speaker:think I can be happier and not like.
Speaker:This and you'll, you'll hear us talking over the next few episodes where
Speaker:we talk a lot about how happiness itself is a, is a fleeting moment.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:It's like a, it's a, it's a, it's a, an emotion that you feel in
Speaker:the moment and then it passes.
Speaker:And the, the true thing that we talk about when we're saying the
Speaker:word happier is like contentment.
Speaker:But that doesn't work for a podcast title.
Speaker:And it's also not what I said to myself.
Speaker:I said, I think I can be happier.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And so that got me thinking like, like I set off on a journey
Speaker:to see if I could be happier.
Speaker:And, and I absolutely have found, um, have found a lot more contentment in my life.
Speaker:And then it just made me think like.
Speaker:I don't know, maybe other people are interested in that too.
Speaker:And it's just another, another voice, another opportunity for people to listen.
Speaker:And something that I think is different is that many of the podcasts and
Speaker:resources out there are hosted by experts
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:who actually know what they're talking about.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:We're just learning along the way.
Speaker:We are, we're learning along the way.
Speaker:So, we are experts in executive functioning and we will bring that in.
Speaker:But, but we are not experts in thinking we can be happier and, uh, and so
Speaker:it, I'm, I'm so happy to be able to, to do this and see where we go.
Speaker:See what happens.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I know.
Speaker:Me too.
Speaker:I have to admit, one of my secret, um.
Speaker:Like desires is to get Lori Santos from the Happiness Lab on.
Speaker:I think I can be happier.
Speaker:I wanted to talk with you about that.
Speaker:I've already been thinking about that.
Speaker:So yes,
Speaker:I did meet her.
Speaker:I did get to meet Laurie at Greens Farms Academy, which is a, a school
Speaker:nearby and she came to, they do a speaker series and she came to
Speaker:speak at the series, uh, last year.
Speaker:So I did get to meet Lori, but uh, we hadn't started the podcast
Speaker:yet, so I couldn't invite her on.
Speaker:But Lori, yes, if you're listening.
Speaker:We love you.
Speaker:We'd love to have you on.
Speaker:yes.
Speaker:Okay, great.
Speaker:Alright.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So let's talk briefly, Amy, about what this show is not right.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:What are we not, what are we not?
Speaker:Because I think it is really important to cover that.
Speaker:Yes, I do.
Speaker:I do wanna make sure we, we clarify that, uh, this is intention is not to
Speaker:go down the road of toxic positivity.
Speaker:We're not here to just say, yeah, just, just be happier.
Speaker:Just do this thing and you'll be happier.
Speaker:That is absolutely not what this is about.
Speaker:You know, we want to, you know, own our own challenges.
Speaker:We want to hear and.
Speaker:delve into others' challenges.
Speaker:So we definitely do not want to dismiss the challenges, in life.
Speaker:We really want to lean into them so we can, you know, can learn.
Speaker:Learn from each other, and learn from others on that.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And as you'll hear some of our guests share that that is where the
Speaker:learning happens is when they did.
Speaker:Lean into it and where they didn't go in with toxic po toxic positivity,
Speaker:just ignoring the challenges.
Speaker:And I'll just, you know, like Pollyanna my way through this and uh, and that is
Speaker:where the true growth and meaning happens.
Speaker:So, uh, in the show we are going, do we have a, so far, we'll see what
Speaker:happens, but so far we've got the idea of doing three types of episodes.
Speaker:One, we'll do deep dives where it's just, just Amy and I
Speaker:talking about, a topic or a book.
Speaker:And then we will also do interviews both with, people who share their stories
Speaker:with us about what, they've gone through.
Speaker:So if you, if you would like to be on our show, please
Speaker:reach out and, and let us know.
Speaker:We're taken all sorts of stories about people who are either on their journey
Speaker:towards more to being happier or have, have had, you know, an experience
Speaker:that has really tested their, their abilities and what they've learned.
Speaker:And then we'll also do just some quick, tips or tools, especially probably leaning
Speaker:pretty heavily into executive functioning.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:Uh, but yeah.
Speaker:So yeah.
Speaker:What are you most excited about, Amy?
Speaker:I, well, I'm excited just to hear, to hear everyone's stories, um,
Speaker:and to have those conversations.
Speaker:And I think I'm, you know, I'm most excited just for
Speaker:us to release some episodes.
Speaker:We've done, you know, a couple of interviews at this point, and I just
Speaker:can't wait to get those out there.
Speaker:What about you?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah, same.
Speaker:I mean, I just, I love, I love talking with people and I
Speaker:love hearing people's stories.
Speaker:And the other thing I really love is, um, looking for patterns looking
Speaker:through four threads that connect all the stories that people share.
Speaker:And it's really, so far what we've heard so far is it's a very, it's
Speaker:a, it's the human experience, like it is a shared experience.
Speaker:And so I think that, I think that, uh, if you are listening and you, and you don't
Speaker:necessarily relate too much to the guest's actual life experience, I think you'll
Speaker:really relate to what they get out of it.
Speaker:So, Hannah, do you wanna, uh, do you wanna share what's coming up here in the
Speaker:yeah,
Speaker:and months?
Speaker:yeah, yeah.
Speaker:Sure.
Speaker:So in the next episode, Amy and I discuss the, , book by Kelly McGonigal,
Speaker:Dr. Kelly McGonigal by the end of the episode, on, on first name basis
Speaker:with her actually like nickname, I think I call her Kel at one point.
Speaker:And she wrote a fantastic book called The Upside of Stress, which
Speaker:is, like just currently sort of guiding a lot of my choices in life.
Speaker:And then, we actually had Neha, who is my therapist on, and we recorded a fantastic
Speaker:conversation with her where she shared some really amazing strategies and insight
Speaker:on the idea of happiness and contentment.
Speaker:And then, Ian joined us.
Speaker:Uh, and he shared his, life story about how he discovered that it's
Speaker:not actually about the goal of happiness in the first place.
Speaker:What you think is your goal ends up being, . Different than you, than you expect.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And then, uh, Jodi, Jodi, uh, Jodi's, story is just amazing.
Speaker:She joined us to talk about learning to find joy again
Speaker:after the death of her husband.
Speaker:So, uh, yeah, just really great stories and, and, and you know,
Speaker:as we said, if you would like to come on and share your story, we
Speaker:would really love to have you so.
Speaker:I'm excited for, for what comes next here, Hannah?
Speaker:So we are, we are planning to close every episode with, with going
Speaker:through the option of three questions.
Speaker:So the first option is to share something that's been hard lately, the second,
Speaker:something you're working towards, and the third, something that's bringing you joy
Speaker:or something you're looking forward to.
Speaker:So, Hannah, you're up first.
Speaker:Which one do you choose today?
Speaker:I'm gonna choose the, something that's been hard for me, this week.
Speaker:, It's Friday and I have to say, thank goodness it is Friday.
Speaker:I kind of felt like I that Friday would never come.
Speaker:And I know you and I were sharing all week that Friday, this
Speaker:week was really challenging.
Speaker:I've just had a lot.
Speaker:I was traveling and now I am back and.
Speaker:I just have been really struggling this week to keep up, to catch
Speaker:up to, keep a positive attitude.
Speaker:It's been really hard, but I've been leaning on the people in my life that
Speaker:give me support and guidance and, leaning very heavily on my, A DHD meds
Speaker:and executive function strategies.
Speaker:So, I'm getting there.
Speaker:I'm getting there.
Speaker:What about you, Amy?
Speaker:it's great.
Speaker:Actually, Hannah, I'm gonna, I'm gonna share something I'm looking forward
Speaker:to and actually thinking about the conversation that we did have with Neha,
Speaker:I'm really gonna be intentional about.
Speaker:Like actually determining this every day.
Speaker:, Even if it's something really small, just to have a little something
Speaker:every day to look forward to.
Speaker:Because yes, as you know, it has been, it's been a rough week.
Speaker:But I'm really looking forward to just today after I finish
Speaker:work, , getting time with my family.
Speaker:I've got,, a kiddo home from college this weekend, so I'm just excited for
Speaker:all of us to have some time together,, and hopefully get outside, , and
Speaker:just enjoy some time together.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Great.
Speaker:So that's it for today.
Speaker:Thank you so much for joining us and listening.
Speaker:And, uh, you can check out the show notes.
Speaker:We will, uh, every episode we will be sharing some information
Speaker:for you in the show notes.
Speaker:Also just a reminder that this podcast is not a substitute for
Speaker:professional mental health support.
Speaker:So we ask you to please, you know, take care of yourself and, and if you
Speaker:do need help, please reach out to a qualified licensed provider for help.
Speaker:We'd love to hear from you.
Speaker:You can visit our website.
Speaker:I can be happier.com and sign up for our newsletter there or shoot us an
Speaker:email at hello at I can be happier.com.
Speaker:Thanks for listening.
